Lenny's First Day Back from Prison

My Neighbor the Ex-Girlfriend

Andrew:

I love the way this film starts - there's so much said in the first shot. Many of my favorite 5sf's aren't good because they're funny, but because they are truly a full film in only five seconds. They can't all be Family Arcade, but My Neighbor the Ex-Girlfriend does a pretty good job.

Our hero is depressed. The only way he can sleep is after some scotch (and his bottle is empty). He is hurting deeply. He's sensitive, yet manly: a modern day Don Draper, a 21st century Hemingway.
But no matter how much he wants to hold onto his dignity, he is reduced to covering his ears with his pillow, like a child, hoping that this horror will go away.

Funny rating: 6
Beauty/Truth rating: 8

John:

I would like to focus for a minute here on the guy banging Kelsey. He really makes the film for me. Is that Brian?

Haley: Andrew, that was really well put. I'd just like to add that the sideways opening shot was spectacular. Otherwise, you said it all, bro.

Jack:
John, that is most definitely Brian and I agree that he is an underrated character in this film. His eager thrusts mimic the pounding that Worley must feel in his head.

How to Hit On Girls But From a Balcony

Haley: It's no turkey, but I'll take it. Part (I) isn't great but is necessary for the progression of the film. Part (II) made me chuckle. Part (III) was when I knew I was watching a 5sf, and I thought it was pretty great. On its own, it might not have cut it, but when placed as part 3 of 5 it worked its magic for me. Part (IV) is pretty weak and is more just follow-up for part 3 and set-up for part 5. Part (V) was pretty great--the scary music and color inversion coming in is key. It was a very nice, tidy, and hilarious conclusion. Overall, I enjoyed it. A good compilation film.

What to Expect When You're Expecting

Jack:

Overall a good film. Let's tally: 2 seconds of setup, 1.5 seconds amusing daydream, 1 second snap back to reality, and half a second of comic gold. The default snapshot of this film captures everything I love about it. Olivia's reaction to the men's Rocket Power-esque bro love handshake made my morning.

Nick:

I just think it's weird that she brought up having kids in front of other people. Seems like she got what she was asking for.

John:

The eyes have it. Olivia's eyes that is.

This isn't one of the greatest 5sfs ever, but it's a solid, blue collar work. Five second of film followed by a brief, hearty chuckle.

If every 5sf this week was one food item on my Thanksgiving plate, this one is the mashed potatoes. "Collection Day" is the cylindrical congealed cranberry jelly cut into slices -- it's crazy and delicious. "Goin' Up" is the green bean casserole -- the vegetable dish that is on the table, but remains untouched. And "Bad Times and Broken Roofs" is the Georgia Moon.

(Georgia Moon is, of course, what the pilgrims drank at the first Thanksgiving. This led to John Smith vomming all over Squanto, the first international incident caused in North America)

Let's hope that Friday's film is the turkey.

Haley: I'm a big fan of this style of video-- bring something up, flash to a person's thoughts, flash back to reality. This one was done with hilarity on all counts. And I agree with Jack that the last scene (Olivia's reaction to the Rocket Power bro-shake) really seals the deal. Also the fact that the bro-shake is continuing as the film is ending is a beautiful touch.

Goin' Up?

John:

Can't say that I'm a fan of this one.

Judah:
I felt like it was going in a different direction, like a gay anal butt type joke. I like that it caught me by surprise. Good for you, 5sf.

Note, I think that all 5sfs are going to be a gay anal butt type joke going into them.

John:

Interesting, I always think (hope) that every 5sf will be a Rousselet suicide/self-mutilation film.

Nick:

I always hope that every 5sf will have a flying building in it.

Collection Day

Haley: 1.78 thumbs up. Love the soundtrack. Love Rousselet. Love the chaos inside. The sheer volume and variety of cans/bottles is impressive, let alone how they are displayed. It's simple and elegant.

Nick: Reminds me of every Sunday morning. Also, could this be a prequel to Casualties of War? If it is, what could have transpired to make this proactive go getter suicidal? Aside from the fact that it's Rousselet, of course.

Welcome to Five-Second Filmology

Today's film is probably the best possible film to run on the birthday of this blog.

John: Perhaps too soon for our friend Nick Stone.

I love the redshift as the film progresses. Does it represent the growing distance in the friendship of Giants hat guy and Roofmonster as a result of Roofmonster's reprehensible drunken actions?

I want to see a sequel with Roofmonster in a drunken rage.

Judah: The text underneath is usually pretty stupid. Not today. Now it's ultra stupid.

"You can't hold Roof Monster down. You can only report him to the police and have your mom mail his sleepover stuff back to his mom while he's in the drunk tank."

Haley: I feel "Bad Times and Broken Roofs" is an instant classic. It was perfect for a Monday morning, and both actors had admirable performances. A classic tale of a young man not knowing who he really is or how he really feels, and discovering the only way he knows how to feel -- through Roofmonster. Will Roofmonster's sober self ever feel whole again? How far will Roofmonster go next time? How long will it be before he realizes his risky Roofmonster lifestyle is not necessarily worth all the roofs ruined and the bloodshed?

I found myself wondering what Giants Hat Guy's reaction to this was. Would he show concern for his friend? Slap him silly? Feed the Roofmonster or set him free? Just things to think about.

Judah: I feel like all the focus is on the roof monster when I think we should feel bad for his friend. That's his stuff. You can't just scream noon and destroy all of a guy's stuff. I see a bit of John's "godzillaocity" and Nick's "belligerent-self-destructiveocity" in roofmonster. Maybe we all have a little roof monster inside of us no homo.

Nick: I think that what the Roofmonster really wanted was to tear down the boundaries between himself and nature. Roofmonsters are meant to be free, not confined within houses or societal norms. A Roofmonster under a roof might as well not be a Roofmonster at all.